In My Mind,Through My Eyes

Chapter 9  One Is Good, But Two Is…  Destiny

Destiny had mixed feelings as she spent her day with Crystal. She felt so bad about not going to check on her in the hospital that she wanted to make it up, but not before she made sure Ashley was straight. After she got caught the first time, she knew stepping her game up was a must. She thought letting Crystal go would be easy, but, since receiving the call from Dr. O’ Conner, her mind had been filled with thoughts of her. Even when Ashley made love to her, Destiny would pretend she was Crystal. At night, while holding Ashley, she couldn’t fight the feelings of wanting Crystal. After realizing how her life had turned into a soap opera, Destiny continued playing the game two ways. She was not sure how to get out of this mess or if she wanted to. For now, she felt content where she was, and that was in Crystal’s arms. She didn’t want to leave, especially since she and Ashley weren’t on the best of terms because of the incident with Crystal, and that had made it easy for her to stay away for days at a time. It appeared that all of that hard work they’d been doing was pointless now. Destiny knew it was her fault, but what was the point of making an effort if it went unnoticed? She gave herself that much credit. Besides, she knew she wasn’t perfect, but she did have needs, too. Maybe, one day, it would work itself out, but, until then, Crystal would do. These thoughts were on her mind as she enjoyed her last night with Crystal. In the morning, she would be Ashley’s fiancée again, until another argument came along. Their last night was the best night, they went out to eat, had a few drinks, and made love until morning. They even made a stop at Starship to make sure their night was something to remember. Since Crystal was new to this, it was Destiny’s pleasure to show her the best toys. They both enjoyed experimenting with the different toys because it made their love making more exciting. At the end of the night, each of them were put to good use. Destiny knew she had taught Crystal some new shit, and, for her, that was a good thing.
The following morning, Destiny got up at six and took a shower. After she got dressed, she prepared to return home. She knew Ashley would be leaving for work by that time. For Destiny, this was all good. She didn’t want to argue that early in the morning.


Chapter 10
The Bigger Woman
Ashley

Today wasn’t a good day for Ashley to be at work. Her body and mind just weren’t up for it, so, as she walked out the door, she decided to make the best of it. Usually, she loved going to work, but, lately, all the sleepless nights had her down. She couldn’t concentrate, and her work had started to fall behind. Everybody at her workplace had noticed it but didn’t ask questions. They respected her and just gave her space.
After arriving twenty minutes late, Ashley drug along, hoping the day went by as quickly as it had come. She hated when she was in this type of mood because, usually, she was so happy. The first stop was the break room for a cup of coffee. After that, she went to her office and closed the door.
“Now, it’s time to get some work done,” Ashley stated out loud.
While going through the papers on her desk, Ashley found a note addressed to her that read:
Hello, Destiny
I know you think you have won this battle, but it is far from over. You see, I knew that I wanted Destiny from the first night I saw her, and we are going to be together. You have no idea how Destiny really feels about me. She won’t tell you that part. This is not over. We will see each other again!
Crystal
After reading the note, Ashley became confused because she thought Destiny had cut all her ties with Crystal. As the day progressed, those words played over and over in the back of her mind. She dialed Destiny’s number, but she never picked up. On the final ring, Ashley let it ring until the voicemail came on. Ashley left a nasty message:
“You and your bitch can have each other! I don’t have time to entertain this bullshit, I gave our relationship another chance, but, obviously, you are not ready for it.”
Ashley hung the phone up. She knew that she and Destiny had been going through it, but she had not thought it was that bad. She did everything in her power not to shed a tear as she put a note on her door and left for the rest of the day. She had refused let those tears fall because she was and always would be the BIGGER WOMAN!!!
Ashley rushed through the traffic and arrived home in fifteen minutes. There was still no car in the driveway or lights on in the apartment, so she knew Destiny wasn’t there. It was not like she had expected her to be. Hell! Destiny never came home anymore. Now, she understood exactly what was going on— the love of her life was still cheating on her. This was not a good feeling, especially when she had done nothing wrong. Ashley knew she didn’t deserve this and didn’t understand why Destiny had proposed to her. Once again, she sat, waiting for Destiny to return. The only difference was that, this time, she wasn’t going anywhere. She packed up Destiny’s clothes and sat them by the front door. There was nothing to talk about. She took off her engagement ring and sat it on top of everything. This was the first time she had ever taken it off, but she refused to be hurt again. Ashley clearly remembered the way Destiny had behaved at the awards ceremony. Her body was there, but her mind was in another place. They used to have so much fun together— dinners, movies, the whole nine. Lately, the only thing they did was avoid each other. Sometimes, they made love. Ashley wanted answers but didn’t want to argue anymore. She didn’t have the energy or the time. If it was over, then let it be. She had given her all, now there was nothing else to give.